My Bucket List

I’ve been fortunate in the last fifteen years or so. My wife, Donna, and I have enough money right now, so when money is needed for roof repairs and other things, we finally have enough. Even our house is paid off. In addition, we have great health insurance, otherwise we would have gone broke from all my hospital bills. So, we’re in really good shape now that my health looks like it will be good now. Because of this I’ve tried to become more grateful for everything.

The concept of a bucket list started with the idea of “never have I ever” thoughts and morphed into New Year’s resolution ideas. Finally, I came up with the idea of a bucket list that would be more structured and significant. So, in addition to trying to remember to be grateful, my bucket list has more to do with opportunities and experiences as much as tangible things. Here they are:

1. I would like to remain healthy. When I was having hip replacement, and lung problems etc., my world kept getting smaller and smaller.
2. I want to somehow get over this never-ending anxiety that I am constantly stuck with especially at night. This anxiety prevents me from traveling and even staying overnight away from home.
3. Then I’d like to have the opportunity to share my story with a much wider audience. This would include sharing my self-help books beyond small groups like NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness).
4. I’d also like the chance to sell many more of my books at Book Fairs and online.
5. In addition, I’d like to expand my footprint in Booksie.com where I publish my work for free.
6. It is important for me to feel useful, and I hope I get a more chances to help others.
7. Donna and I never travel because of my nerves, so I hope we can figure out a way to go places and see new things without me absorbing all the energy around me.
8. I wish all my friends that I’ve had over the years to experience health and prosperity.
9. I’d also like to live for a number of years, to further develop my spiritual and artistic experiences.
10. Finally - and this sounds a little morbid - I’d like to experience a peaceful death. I’ve discovered from my experience with others that, although death isn’t painful dying can be, I’d like to avoid any serious suffering before death, if possible.

Again, my bucket literally is a desire for experience and opportunities that aren’t usually what’s thought of as items on a bucket list. For now, by remaining strong and healthy with no financial struggles, is my ideal for the coming years. I feel blessed that I am loved enough to be even able to consider this unusual bucket list. I’d like to finish with a poem I have just written about God’s blessing in my life.

It Would Have Been Enough

If you had protected me in childhood and helped me earn my degree, it would have been enough.

If you had cured me of my cancers and set my body free, it would have been enough.

If you had saved me from despair when mental illness entrapped me, it would have been enough.

If you had inspired me to be a writer and blessed me with belief, it would have been enough.

If you had offered me the spirit and helped me find inner peace, it would have been enough.

If you had led me to the light and helped my souls to softly speak, it would have been enough.

Because your mercy still surrounds me, and your love is all around me, so I’ve loved you then and always, you are my Lord and God.

(Please remember these are my own ideas, and I’m not attempting to persuade anyone to change theirs.)

Quotes:

“According to the ancient Chinese proverb, A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step.” John F. Kennedy

“All our dreams can come true, if we have the courage to pursue them.” Walt Disney

“Courage is being scared to death, but saddling up anyway.” John Wayne

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