At Least I Can Still Write
I thought I’d write this newsletter today, because something funny happened that I thought you might enjoy.
Because I’m growing older, I’ve needed more help from my wife, Donna. A few years ago, it got really bad when I had a hip replacement, serious blood clots and a pacemaker, all in less than two years. Things are much better now, but Donna continues to help me with everything from medication reminders and filling out all kinds of forms at doctor’s offices. I still try to help with things like laundry, housecleaning and lawn mowing but I can only do about half of it. Nevertheless, there is an increasing number of things I need help with that has made Donna a kind of caregiver. Just today when I was getting a root canal for my tooth I reflected upon all the ways in which Donna helps me, as she was going over my treatment plan with the dental assistant.
It didn’t used to be this way. When I retired and Donna was still working, I used to do most of the chores. I did most of the shopping, cleaned the house, and mowed the lawn, so she wouldn’t have to. I also did a lot of painting and took care of most of the fall leaf raking, so she didn’t have to deal with them. I even took care of car maintenance and sometimes spent all day at the dealership. Donna’s friends mused about how lucky she was to have a husband who would work on chores so much.
I even sold our house and found another one while Donna was on vacation with our niece, Emily. Even then though, Donna dealt with the mountain of paperwork that goes with selling and buying a house.
Of course, that was ten years ago and circumstances have changed. I imagined a retirement filled with golf, traveling and parties. Instead, Donna drives me to endless doctor appointments at which she has to help me with all the information, and then goes back and forth with the pharmacist about prescriptions.
Anyway, at the dentist’s office today, as Donna was again talking to the dental assistant, I began to reflect upon how Donna, who even drives most the time, has become my caregiver. Although, I really try, I’ve accepted that I have limitations that are both frustrating and depressing. While we were talking, I mentioned to Donna about being my caregiver and said to her, “It’s a good thing I can still write, so you won’t leave me.” Donna just chuckled and replied, “John…. If was going to leave you, I would have done that a long time ago.” I took it to be a humorous positive statement. Nevertheless, Donna has stayed with me for over forty years of marriage, and although I have helped her with her own health crises at times, clearly, she has had to help me more.
Ironically, after Donna’s humorous comment, another dental assistant came in while Donna was in the waiting room and said, “It’s so sweet that some couples stay together for so many years and are happy. You must be truly blessed!” So, I guess I’ve got that going for me. Which is nice!
Although it’s true that I still am able to get my work published, it hardly makes up for everything else. I get up every morning and try my best, but it still is a lot some days. So, despite everything, at least I can still can write!
I hope you found this newsletter relatable and enjoyable. See you next time!
Quotes:
"It does not matter how slowly you go as long as you do not stop." — Confucius
“Confidence... thrives on honesty, on honor, on the sacredness of obligations, on faithful protection and on unselfish performance. Without them it cannot live.” – Franklin D. Roosevelt
"I intend to live forever. So far, so good." — Steven Wright
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