Boys Will Be Boys
In this newsletter, I want to write about boys as they transition into men. Now this analysis isn’t appropriate for all boys and men, however, it is based on my own experience. One of the main themes of mine has been violence. When I was just a small boy, I collected insects. I had an ammonia filled killing jar and it sometimes took days for beetles to die. I had no sense of conscience about it.
Then, I moved on to fishing. My friends and I used to fish for hours on end at the river near my house. When the fishing was good, we could catch dozens of sunfish, bass, and blue gill. When we ran out of bait, we’d cut open the live fish we had to make more bait. This sadistic practice finally dawned on me when I read somewhere that fish have highly developed nervous systems. Until then, I had no sense of moral judgment about it.
Then I turned to hunting. I vividly remember the primal feelings I used to experience when I hiked the meadows and forest with a shotgun in my hands. We’d shoot birds, squirrels and rabbit. Once I shot a rabbit and it didn’t die, but I couldn’t finish the poor thing off, so my friend had to kill the rabbit with a knock on its head. The rabbit’s cries sounded just like a child crying.
The reason I bring all this up is because I believe boys and men have a propensity for violence that is part DNA and part environmental conditioning. Basically, I had to unlearn my thought patterns so as to realize that killing and the intention to kill are not appropriate for my deeper inner self.
This propensity for violence is more, I think, than just socialization. Virtually all gangs are male and almost all mass shootings are perpetrated by boys and men. Even war, until recently, was always a product of male participation.
Now I’m not suggesting that we don’t need police or soldiers, because unfortunately to this day if we don’t defend ourselves, it is naïve to suppose we can’t be attacked. The problem is that male energy still dominates in the world, it is slowly killing us. The destruction of nature and the unrelenting need to compete has led to the destruction of entire cultures.
But there is hope because the female energy is beginning to take hold in an attempt to restore the balance. For example, more women are in politics. However, in my opinion, we don’t need women to be more like men, instead we need men to become more like women. It is common knowledge the generally speaking, women have more compassion than men, and they are more spiritual. Women, I believe are also better able to express empathy as well. When I see how far women have begun to survive and thrive in a man’s world, I secretly hope that someday men will learn more about sensitivity and spirituality.
Although it’s true that times are changing and there are numerous examples, I just wish it would happen faster, so that humankind would learn one basic belief. After thousands of years, we are still trying to kill each other. It would be helpful if we could overcome that propensity.
I’d like to finish this newsletter with a poem called “Steel Rain,” that describes some of the realities about war:
Steel Rain
Steel rain coffins the earth,
With children too young to matter.
Mangled and bruised, weeping and burnt,
Their blood like the world is splattered.
Adults play at war, greedy and sure,
That right are the bombs they drop.
Terror still comes, the children endure,
And prayers like the wind never stops.
These children of fear, grow up to hate,
And join every battle that comes.
Armies evolve and don’t hesitate,
To replay the cycle at once.
New children die, while old children shoot,
At enemies they now imagine.
Again fall the bombs, steel rain breaks through,
And mothers cry out for protection.
But deep in the souls of spiritual men,
The steel rain may stop like the guns.
Bursting with light, they’ll recognize sin,
And shelter the children again.
Then in the day of warm, liquid rain,
The weapons of war will be broken.
Then children in pain, will sing out the names,
Of God-fearing men who are holy.
(Please remember these are my own ideas, and I’m not attempting to persuade anyone to change theirs.)
Quotes:
Yin and yang, male and female, strong and weak, rigid and tender, heaven and earth, light and darkness, thunder and lightning, cold and warmth, good and evil...the interplay of opposite principles constitutes the universe. Confucius
There's no honorable way to kill, no gentle way to destroy. There is nothing good in war. Except its ending. Abraham Lincoln
We have guided missiles and misguided men. Martin Luther King, Jr.
https://www.facebook.com/writerjohnfzurn
photos by: personal photo; mike-cox-tRuD5RHbPUo-unsplash
